30 Day Blog Challenge Day 27: Is Having Cerebral Palsy So Bad?

As everyone who reads my blog here knows, I was born with cerebral palsy and hydrocephalus. Throughout my life so far, People's reactions to it have been different. There have been people who have bullied me, mocked or not understood my disabilities well. There have been those who acted surprised that I am intelligent "but you're SO imtelligent" "use your intelligence to solve your problems in life." Appalingly, this last statement was also uttered by a doctor. 

Sorry for them, but life doesn't work that way. There have been people who have labelled me as the person who stood out, the person who "didn't understand" or the maths teacher who told me I'd fail my  maths GCSE exam every day I was in her clas just because I  was in the lowest set for the subject. Ifyou're wondering whether she was right, I didn't fail, I passed. I got an E grade, but I passed. Even before I have memory of it, my intelligence was  been debated, and still is, by people who don't understand the meaning of CP and hydrocephalus, much less how it affects me.  

I, like many people with disabilities, have experienced both sides of the story, from people having utter pity for me, to those who have utter admiration. 

I'm only human. I make mistakes in life, and have regrets, but I also make the best of things, and always have done. Yesterday I was told having CP must be "awful" and I responded that I was born with it and hydrocephalus, and don't know life without it.   Yes, there are good days and bad days, but doesn't everyone have those whether they are disabled or not? I'll always remember something my neurologist told me, that what life deals us is often makes the fact that a person is has the disability or disabilities, they do, with all it's  related problems, pale in comparison. 

For example, right now, I am finding that the proorities in my mind of a future move, children or marriage, is causing more problems and worry to me than the fact I have the dissabilities I do does, because everything about my disabilities is just a long standing fact, definite, and "just how life is." 

The other things, however, are vital ingredients to Alfredo and I in life, what we want for ourselves, and therefore take more importance, because I will always have my disabilities. 

I'm proud of the fact I have the skills I do, that I can speak Spanish fluently, that when people value me, they value my kindness and the fact I am a good listener.  I value the effort and time I take to work on my novels. 

Above all, I would say I have a good life, I have people who love me, confidence in myself, and a drive to reach my dreams, which is all you need really. I'm also proud of the fact I don't give up, despite people assuming they would in my situation. 

My question is, why? Why would you do that? OK, I almost died at various points after I was born, but it's the people who fought for me to live, who thought my life was worth saving, who I am truly grateful to. To my parents who persuaded the doctors to keep fighting for me when the prognosis was hopeless, and to the doctors and nurses who fought to bring me into the world and then to get me out of the NICU  despite the fact they knew I would face a lifetime of complex disabilities. 

To every neurosurgeon who has ever replaced one of my faulty shunts, and given me back life. 

Back to the title of this blog post, having cerebral palsy  and hydrocephalus isn't "bad" at all: after all, life is what you make it!